How Fu Manchu Facial Hair Makes You A Better Lover

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Did you know that a Fu Manchu mustache can make you a better lover? Believe it.

fu manchu facial hair

It turns out that sporting a Fu Manchu packs major mojo. In a casual study, women said Fu Manchu mustache-wearing men were masculine, tough, dominant, mature, and aggressive. The women claimed these men made the best romantic partners, either for a long-term relationship or a one-night fling. Read on to find out why.

What Is It About The Fu Manchu?

What is the secret mojo the Fu Manchu seems to impart to an otherwise bland, boring dude? That, it turns out, is a damn good question. Take a guy who, without the mustache, is just a blah-looking nobody. You know the type. The guy might look like your tax accountant, or maybe your kid’s middle school assistant principal. B-o-r-i-n-g. Women never look twice at this guy. Ever.

But stick a serious, full-blown Fu Manchu on his face and let the fireworks begin. That same boring guy sporting a Fu Manchu now has women aggressively checking him out, and that’s just for starters. They move on to passing him notes that would make a sailor blush. And if that doesn’t do the trick they get downright insistent. In some cases walking right up to the guy and making bold inquiries involving mustache-rides, and suggesting creative ways to vigorously spend the afternoon.

So what is it about this mustache that seems to get the ladies all hot and bothered? Well, as noted above, women say the mustache screams masculine, tough and dominant. All traits that women find sexy. But, perhaps the better question to ask is, who cares? The main thing is that it works. And, at the end of the day, isn’t that really all that matters?

Does The Fu Manchu Itself Make The Wearer A Better Lover?

Women say the Fu Manchu mustache makes the wearer seem hot, sexy, and desirable. But what about where the rubber meets the road, if you’ll pardon the expression? What about in the bedroom – where it really counts? Does the mustache lend a special Fu Manchu Mojo Magic to the actual lovemaking?

Yes, say many women. Without putting too fine a point on it, there’s a reason this mustache carries the nickname, “mojo-maker.” May I be frank? Thank you. This giant, hairy mustache aids the man in all areas of lovemaking, which extends to all areas of a woman’s body. Those thick, voluminous, bushy bristles seem to tickle and please in all the right places. I’m sure you get the picture. If you don’t, you’ve gotta be a virgin, right? Otherwise, there is something seriously wrong with your imagination. And probably your sex life.

So there you have it, the lowdown on why a Fu Manchu mustache makes you a better lover. If you’ve ever had any doubts about what kind of mustache you should grow, I’d say the answer is clear. The Fu Manchu is the mojo-man of mustaches.

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Ms. Thompson is a beard aficionado and lover of all things beard. She is married to a bearded man who is currently working on his yeard; and can't wait to provide her opinions on the process. Her and her husband live on their farm with two rambunctious boys and their dog who hasn't figured out how to leave the livestock alone.